Antiquatis

Hello Friends,

I write this almost in a daze. I have been lead here by series of events so ridiculously synchronous that thinking back on them makes my head spin.

Im a little lost. I think I need a push in a new direction. I decided to post here because I noticed a post where a member had a vision of a man with a ginger beard. viewtopic.php?f=2&t=1062&start=0

Earlier this month I woke from a dream and remember having a really great conversation, (like I had known him for hundreds of years) with an angel/god/ spirit with a ginger beard and white robe.

I though it may have been a sign form my Holy guardian Angel which I believe is the term used in Western White Magick for the Higher Self.

Now, Im not so sure. This was the second post i read here since registering and it I believe it to be quite synchronous.


I'll briefly outline my spiritual journey so as people know where I'm at and where it might be good to go next.

I live in the Republic of Ireland. Its a country that until very recently was far from the New Age. It is now consumed by materialism and for the most part is spiritually bankrupt despite a past steeped in mysticism and Christianity.

I was bored with work figured and there was something more to life.
So I took a year out and got very high.
This took me through all the negative, fear based conspiracies, till I came out the other end, so to speak, into spirituality/ mediation etc

Ive since put away the pot.

Ive read and experimented with Taoist sexual techniques and Tai Chi.

Ive read the Law of One/Ra Material, the Q'uo material, parts of the Joshiah, (and still not satisfied!?)

Done some Third Eye Awakening using the Sam Sagan methods. Experimented with Auric vision via Robert Bruce

I have begun to mediate daily with some really pleasant purple space moments.

I have heard ringing in my left ear, and felt presences.

I can feel energy running through me and can direct it upwards, like mini kundalini moments, but without the free enlightenment on the side.

Ive had a look at ritual white magick and keep a magickal diary.
I have preformed the Banishing Ritual and then read Mediation of the Seer. A shortedn versions of Crowleys, (http://www.sacred-texts.com/oto/lib30.htm).

I like the sentiments but find the ritualistic aspects a little intense. Like a very heavy energy descends on the room.

Im a little concerned regarding use of magick and karma. Every act has a repercussions etc..

I met with a healer who repeatedly warned me against oiuja boards and that she was getting that message strongly. . Ive never used one nor thought about it but figured she was referring to my recent pendulum work which had me feeling very unpleasant.

I've begun living a STO lifestyle but Its hard. I feel a power building within me, but I haven't found an outlet for it yet.

I still dont know my origins, (wanderer, native) but im not sure If I ever will know or if it really matters.

If anything here resonated with people from their experiences and they have have something to suggest/recommend/read that would be super!

I think Ive opened a lot of different topics here but no matter, I dont mind a messy thread, let people offer what they have to offer, and I'll deal with the housekeeping!

Hello.

As a reflex action, I would tend to hesitate before equating an angel with my higher self. Not that I was there. There are different forms of Western White Magick and they do not all agree.

Where do you want to go next? You may receive higher quality help if you decide where you want to go. Otherwise, it may not matter that much where you do go next.

Ireland has a very rich pre-Christian history. If you don't know what to explore next, you could try that (i.e. Celtic Mythology and Legend).

You might consider exploring the works in the Antiquatis library.

Did you enjoy it? Ritual magick as such is not for everyone. Oppressive things can feel heavy. So can things that are dense.

Everyone is a magical creature and exercises this though mostly unconsciously in today's world. It can be a choice to more actively plan one's actions and their associated repercussions (if any). It is possible to plan actions that do not repercuss.

Both can be used to contact other entities (incarnate or disincarnate). If not done with some care, who knows who might show up to communicate with you.

What is an STO lifestyle? I haven't really heard that term before.

If there is something specific on the site(s) that resonates with you, feel free to share. That may be a way to get more directed assistance.

Welcome to Antiquatis! It's a bit quiet right now because LoneBear (the founder and operator of the Antiquatis website) is physically recovering.


Excellent! My first name is Parnell (I know it's supposed to be a surname)!

I don't really have much to add to what Arcelius has already posted, but I do want to point out something interesting that I've noticed recurring in your post. Where you've (I assume) intended to use the word "meditate" you've slipped with the word "mediate". Just from a surface scan, it looks like you are mediating between the feminine (Anima) within you and the masculine (Animus) within you; harmonia is the desired state between the Anima and Animus - not bickering parents When you meditate, do your "mediation" with the intention to create harmony, not just "keeping the peace" (which many parents do in failing marriages, it's also what divorce lawyers/mediators get paid for).

Focus on those two "elements" within you, the masculine and the feminine, you may be surprised at what it is they want to show you


Without a point of origin you can't create a stable wormhole (Stargate SG1 reference)!

Hi well wisher!
I can relate to most of what you have written. I came to this site the same way as you mate, Ive learned alot since joining.



I cant remember what the guy I met was wearing, I also cant remember what they said to me, I remember asking their names (there was a woman with him) but I cant recall them.
I went and talked to the stars as I do and respectfully asked to see my spirit guide/s, not that night but the next the man and woman visited me.

Thats my experience with my guides, they have saved my butt many a time! If they are my higher self then Id look the part as I can grow a mean ginger beard!



My ancestory goes back to Ireland, a viking from the now Norway area, Ambliah/ Amhlaibh invaded there.
New Zealand sounds similar to what you say about Ireland, our society has become very Americanised and the country is a melting pot of many pacific islanders, eastern and western ethniticity. Very few people attend religous meetings, the majority that do are well aged. Our youth are a new age of just doing what they want (nothing ).
Dont get me wrong it is a great country. Haha do I dare say the best int the world?

Ive also put away the pot.



My ears ring all the time, what is it you think is happening when your ears ring?



Sounds like it maybe your Chi or you maybe picking up signals.
When Im starting to feel overcome in crowds or lines (most likely past drug use paranoia) or come across a presence that feels intimidating, I will visualise projecting an energy field around me and it acts like a shield. If that doesnt work I project blasts of white energy out, much like the pertromis charm in harry potter.



I know the power feeling! I find most change a challenge, the lifestyle and personal ones are the most dificult I feel, Ive learned to not give up. All the good eventually adds up from your STO doings I feel.



I dont think it matters where one is from.
Ask yourself does this feel like your home? You may want to try find out if your a primate.